[ i do, he doesn't say, because yasusada has more to say, and he can tell. but... it's a thoughtful way to phrase it, too. he can't make flayn think anything. he can't ask her to think that he's terrible, because she...
she saw the worst part of yin yu, by far, and she still wanted to be near him. she was upset, when he ran from her, so horrified that the most vulnerable part of him was cast out into the open without his permission, so afraid of what she'd think of him that he'd cut the loss before it could happen.
...but it didn't happen.
he listens quietly, to yasusada. it resonates - from his failings as a god and his banishment, a breaking in its own right, to the fear of this friend of yasusada's. he wonders if perhaps this person is around (and if they'd particularly enjoy having all of their insecurities casually shared with someone else), but, says nothing else. yin yu is not afraid of being unloved, because he just is, or.
he has been. maybe it's not just flayn, either. maybe at home, he's no one, a masked officer with no name (and he was, but did people care about him there, too? besides yizhen, who was misguided and stupid - the ghosts in the city? taizi dianxia? ...chengzhu?) but here, he's been someone.
yin yu looks over at yasusada for a long moment. his expression is still hidden, but, he reaches up, and slowly pushes the mask up on the top of his head so he can rub at his face with his sleeve. ridiculous. sharing emotions with lili a few weeks ago opened up some kind of cork in him. ]
...You're smart, Yasusada. [ he says, eventually, from behind his sleeve. his mouth is curved up, a little bit. ] Smarter than I am, I think. This friend of yours sounds like a good person to me.
[ he doesn't really have an answer for him about it, either. it's something to think about: what's black and white and what isn't. things like love, and trust, and everything in between. what a strange relationship they've formed, in such a strange place.
...he doesn't mind it, so much.
leaning back, finally, yin yu turns to really look at yasusada. there are dark circles under his eyes, but overall, he's...fine. as plain faced as ever, his eyes maybe a little wet, and a small, not quite smile on his face. ] ...I owe you an apology--I don't know if you were aware, or not, but I do. You remind me of someone I used to know, once, and I treated you differently because of it. You didn't deserve that.
[ you must live in the present moment.
if they do really die here, at least, maybe, finally, he could do so with few regrets. ]
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she saw the worst part of yin yu, by far, and she still wanted to be near him. she was upset, when he ran from her, so horrified that the most vulnerable part of him was cast out into the open without his permission, so afraid of what she'd think of him that he'd cut the loss before it could happen.
...but it didn't happen.
he listens quietly, to yasusada. it resonates - from his failings as a god and his banishment, a breaking in its own right, to the fear of this friend of yasusada's. he wonders if perhaps this person is around (and if they'd particularly enjoy having all of their insecurities casually shared with someone else), but, says nothing else. yin yu is not afraid of being unloved, because he just is, or.
he has been. maybe it's not just flayn, either. maybe at home, he's no one, a masked officer with no name (and he was, but did people care about him there, too? besides yizhen, who was misguided and stupid - the ghosts in the city? taizi dianxia? ...chengzhu?) but here, he's been someone.
yin yu looks over at yasusada for a long moment. his expression is still hidden, but, he reaches up, and slowly pushes the mask up on the top of his head so he can rub at his face with his sleeve. ridiculous. sharing emotions with lili a few weeks ago opened up some kind of cork in him. ]
...You're smart, Yasusada. [ he says, eventually, from behind his sleeve. his mouth is curved up, a little bit. ] Smarter than I am, I think. This friend of yours sounds like a good person to me.
[ he doesn't really have an answer for him about it, either. it's something to think about: what's black and white and what isn't. things like love, and trust, and everything in between. what a strange relationship they've formed, in such a strange place.
...he doesn't mind it, so much.
leaning back, finally, yin yu turns to really look at yasusada. there are dark circles under his eyes, but overall, he's...fine. as plain faced as ever, his eyes maybe a little wet, and a small, not quite smile on his face. ] ...I owe you an apology--I don't know if you were aware, or not, but I do. You remind me of someone I used to know, once, and I treated you differently because of it. You didn't deserve that.
[ you must live in the present moment.
if they do really die here, at least, maybe, finally, he could do so with few regrets. ]